Barbara Duffy's Obituary
Barbara Mae Beyer Duffy – A Great and Gracious Lady
Barbara Mae Beyer Duffy, age 89, passed away on June 10, 2020, ten days after marking her eighty-ninth birthday. In her last days she was comforted by her six children who remained by her side around the clock, reminiscing and sharing memories of a life that was well lived and well loved. She was pre-deceased by her beloved husband of 62 years, James J. Duffy just five months earlier in January 2020.
It has been suggested that she remained on this earth days longer than anticipated as her escort to heaven, her husband Jim, was late to his appointed task, stopping to share his joy at their upcoming reunion with everyone he encountered.
Barbara was born to Frank and Mae Beyer on May 30, 1931 in Jersey City, New Jersey. She was the second of three children, and sadly was the only one of the three to survive past the age of seven. Although she was denied their company growing up, she made sure to keep her siblings Frank and Joanie alive in her memories and the in stories she shared with her children.
Through her formative years, Barbara developed a profound faith and she seriously considered entering the convent after high school. After much prayer and consideration, she abandoned the thought of becoming a nun out of a sense of familial duty to her parents. While she remained confident in that life altering decision, in later years there may have been a few instances, when in the midst of some particularly chaotic days raising six rambunctious children, she may have rethought that decision!
Barbara Beyer then took the corporate world by storm. Despite some initial colorful and “sketchy” employment endeavors, including working alongside her best friend Flossie at “Nylon Sids”, she soon began a very promising career with General Foods. She was tapped for several promotions and selected for specialized management training. She was the epitome of the smart, fashionable and elegant career woman, working in the vibrant Manhattan of the mid-1950’s.
Her life’s path and social circles led her to meet the love of her life, James J Duffy from Manhattan. They married on November 9, 1957 and went on to live a love story, which is the stuff of legends. She rejoiced at the births of their six children, having mourned a childhood without siblings. She devoted her life to raising her children, wrapping them in an atmosphere of love, laughter and devotion, where each child felt treasured and special, except maybe on those occasions when they were all dressed alike.
After the passing of her father Frank in 1962, her mother Mae moved in to the family’s home and together she and her mother developed an incredibly close bond. They were a dynamic duo who worked together to create an idyllic home life for the family. They always found time for fun and were often found in complete convulsive laughter, tears streaming down their faces in the retelling of silly family stories and in listening to some of the crazier carryings-on of her children.
She was a wonderful hostess and took great pride in hosting meals, parties, sleepovers and providing temporary housing for friends going through tough times and the stray animals her children would bring home.
Throughout her adulthood, Barbara had several passions including reading, her faith, animals and supporting mothers in need. She put her exemplary knitting skills to
great use in support of charitable programs.
An enthusiastic proponent of reading, she would spend countless hours reading to her young children, and later grandchildren, knowing these precious times would create a love of learning and reading that would last a lifetime.
Faith and Family were the touchstones of her life. She was a deeply religious and profoundly spiritual person. She was a follower of the charismatic movement and was a vessel of many of the gifts of the Holy Spirit including the gifts of prophecy and speaking in tongues.
She fiercely loved her animal family members and they were devoted to her. We are comforted to know she is now reunited with and receiving big wet kisses from her Labrador Retriever “children” Dublin, Dillon, and Seamus and reunited with childhood dogs Terri and Snoopy and the myriad of cats she mothered, especially the one who stared it all, Omen.
She dedicated her later years to help care for her grandchildren where she was once again teacher, friend and beloved Mom Mom. A fixture at sporting events, plays, recitals, holiday parades, graduations, birthdays, she loved being anywhere her grandchildren were featured. She was one of a kind, and remains a beacon of faith, family, love and devotion; “an angel in the shape of our Mom.”
Barbara is survived by her children, Joan B. Duffy (Anton Van Straaten), James J. Duffy, Esq. (Joelle), Dr. Tara Duffy, (Bill Lynch), Barbara M Duffy, Christopher J. Duffy, Esq. and Kathleen C. Duffy; Her grandchildren, Liam Lynch, Aiden Lynch, Keeley Lynch, Kieran Lynch, Eamonn C. Duffy and Luke F. Duffy.
A private prayer service will be held on Saturday, June 27, 2020. A Funeral Mass will be celebrated at a later date when the family can welcome all who would like to be part of this celebration of life.
In lieu of flowers, donations in her memory may be made to two organizations that promote causes near to her heart, animal welfare and early childhood reading.
- North Shore Animal League: www.Animalleague.org.
- Ladies of Charity of the Catholic Charities of the Archdiocese of New York. Checks made payable to Ladies of Charity may be sent to
1011 First Avenue, Room 1316B New York, NY 10022
What’s your fondest memory of Barbara?
What’s a lesson you learned from Barbara?
Share a story where Barbara's kindness touched your heart.
Describe a day with Barbara you’ll never forget.
How did Barbara make you smile?